Importance

Read Hindi translation here: अहमियत

The life knows how to teach everything at right time,
Even then, time to time it teases us at its prime.
Probably, it's like a strict teacher,
Leaves marks of experience at each corner.
Nothing happens either pre-maturely, nor late,
Moments pass and remains memories and fate.
Every turn in this path has importance,
You might skip any, that has no chance.

Its important to lose things that you own in life,
Otherwise we wont understand what having is like.
Take the tears for instance, who loves them shedding
But, if its not for them, whats the value of laughing?
Or, just see these seasons, Sir
when warm, we ask for rain and winter.
When pours, we wish for it to pause and stop
In winters, we dream for summer nights to hop.
We come back to same place, and there goes wheel
This heart never gets satisfaction, continues to reel.

They kept on calling in shrilled voices to glance back once,
I kept on moving, asking them to wait for few more moments.
Years later, when the silence spread out around,
And, sparked the thought of going back in mind,
Turned back, but nothing was there to be found.
Cried my hearts out, banged head with hands,
Childhood memories kept flashing at backhands.
Now, when i have lost everything of yours,
These memories haunt me behind the doors.
I Remember when on shoulders, you used to carry
Thinking those as helicopter and plane, were moments of merry.
How you used to wriggle at my slightest "aah",
Remember your lullabies, and patted me to sleep.
But everything has passed,
Its neither the same time, nor the same moments.
You remember? Do you?
Only memories are alive,
Only memories are alive.

This time life taught me once again,
Opened my eyes, don't let another chance go in vain.
Neither the time is going to turn back, nor the paths,
I wish now to get burnt with these flames.
I don't know what's right and wrong at the moment,
The wound is very deep and very frequent.
But what's use of all this now,
Everything is over, let it go.
Life has also moved on, like some big chapter,
Whom to claim, who will ponder?
Will try to find, if there is any humanity left inside to take stance,
Reckless this life, else will teach once again the Importance.

अहमियत

Read English translation here: Importance.

ये जिंदगी सब कुछ सही समय पर सिखाना जानती है,

वक़्त बेवक़्त जाने फिर भी हमें कितना तरसाती  है। 

शायद एक कठोर शिक्षक की भाँति है यह,

तजुर्बे की छाप छोड़ जाती है हर मोड़ पर वह। 

ना ये वक़्त से पहले कुछ होने देती है, ना वक़्त के बाद,

ये भी सही है कि लम्हे गुजर जाते हैं, रह जाती है बस याद। 

लम्बे से इस सफर में राह का हर मोड़ अहम है,

बच निकलेगा कहीं से, ये तेरा वहम् है। 

जिंदगी में अहम है अपनी चीजों का खोना,

वर्ना शायद हम न समझें कि क्या होता है होना। 

आंसुओं को ही देख लो, किसे पसंद है कभी रोना,

पर जो ये न हो तो कौन जानेगा क्या होता है हसीं का होना। 

अब इस मौसम को ही ले लीजिये न आप जनाब,

गर्म होता है तो कहते हैं, सर्द और बारिश लाजवाब,

बारिश होती है तो कहता है, थम जा अब, 

सर्द में कहते हैं, सही थी वो गर्मी की शब। 

वापस वहीँ जाते हैं, चलता है फिर से ये चक्का,

मन नहीं मानता, हो कर कभी किसी एक का। 

वो बरबस आवाज़ लगाते रहे, देख तो लो एक बार मुड़ कर,

हम कहते रहे, रुक-ठहर, अभी जाने दे मुझे, थोड़ी देर सब्र कर। 

अर्से बाद जब गहरा सन्नाटा छाया, 

और मुड़ने का ख्याल जहन में आया,

पीछे पलट कर देखा तो तुझे कहीं न पाया। 

फूट फूट कर रोये, सर पीटा हमने अपना,

याद आता रहा तेरे संग बीता जो बचपना। 

अब जब खो चुका मैं सब कुछ तेरा,

तब जा कर इन यादों के साये ने मुझे घेरा। 

याद है जब वो बचपन में कंधे पर बिठाते थे,

वही हेलीकाप्टर और प्लेन समझ खिलखिलाते थे। 

हर छोटी सी आह पर कैसे तड़प जाते थे,

याद है गोद में लोरियाँ गाकर हमें सुलाते थे। 

पर सब कुछ तो चला गया है,

न वो पल है, न वह लम्हे है, और न वो वक़्त है। 

याद है तुम्हें ?

याद ही तो है बस,

याद ही तो है बस। 

अब के बार भी सिखा गयी ये जिंदगी मुझे,

आँखे खोल दी कि अगली बार अहमियत सूझे। 

न वह समय मुड़ने वाला है, न ये राह,

चाहत है जैसे मुझे भी जला दे ये दाह। 

नहीं मालूम हमें क्या सही, क्या गलत इस वक़्त,

पर चोट बहुत गहरी है और घाव बहुत ही सख्त।

क्या फायदा इन सब का लेकिन, 

वो सब तो जा चुका, बीत गए वो दिन। 

जिंदगी भी बढ़ गयी, जो लम्बी सी हो कोई आयत,

किससे करें गिला, शिकवा और शिकायत। 

ढूढेंगे अगर बची हो जहन में जो इंसानियत,

निर्दय ये जिंदगी, वरना बेवक़्त फिर सिखा जाएगी अहमियत। 

Forest of Life

While going through my journey,
I saw many trees on roadside.
In fact, that was a path between forests.
Trees and trees on both sides of road,
Standing in a row, one after another,
And many more behind them.
I thought to take a pause and explore
The breathtaking artistry of God.
How did he put all these in this fashion?
Is it just some normal thing or anything else?
There must be many more like these, i suppose.
And, we cut them down to make houses for us?
How reckless we are? Did they not feel pain?
But, had we not done this, then what?
These chairs, table, furniture, windows, doors
And all those elements of comfort,
How would have been our life without those?
Still, how logical was it to make them sacrifice?
Was that correct what we did?
What do we know all these Sir,
Our ancestors must have thought something.

When i ran my sight through that dense forest,
Found similarities with life's structure.
We also stand in a row,
One after another, following others.
Who asks for others in this big world,
All trees have to grow on their own,
So that they can grab the most of sunlight.
All these are struggles, to survive, no other option.
And, these small new born ones,
What will happen to them?
How will they survive without sunlight?
Those big ones cover their sky.
So dense is the forest, that
Even light doesn't penetrate through.
But, some trees are flexible, swinging with air
Making little space available for small ones
Some of those grab the fingers of small ones
They wrap around them, to have a Godfather.
Somehow, they come up, to see the sky.

Presumably, life is also the same.
Some big people try to grab all,
Some of them are very nice people,
They give chances to smaller ones.
They let them have some facilities to grow.
Then, there are those smaller ones,
Either you fight for growth and survival,
Or, you die right there, no world for weak.
Sometimes, grab support of big people
On other times, by adjusting self as per conditions.
Finding ways of survival and growth,
But, that makes the forest denser, isn't it?

There, that is how forest and life are not same,
Doesn't matter how dense is the life's forest,
As long as there are good trees,
Smaller one will keep on sprouting.
This forest will keep on expanding its wings,
But, why do we say big or small
Powerful or weak
Rich or poor
Intelligent or fool
In the end, all are same only
Similar life lies beneath everyone.

And one day, you will be hunted down
To make life easier for someone else.
No one will come to justify right or wrong,
Saying probably, that was for best.

The Weekend (Monday)

Read The Weekend (Sunday) here.

Read The Weekend (Saturday) here.

Monday...

Well, Monday is not always counted in weekend, indeed there are Monday Blues, but there's no harm extending your weekend. Anyway, whatever was going on for past 2 days, it was worth it. It was last day for me to be with her. I have had a hard time sleeping, especially after what happened yesterday. I was afraid whether she will come or not. But, there is always something special, and that’s why I loved her. She called me, gave me time, and asked me to meet. I always knew, it's not a yes, but indeed it was her generosity, and appreciation for what I had done. Probably, at the end of the day, even if you don’t have results, you must have something good to smile about.

As usual, metro station, "Will you be able to come by 3 pm?" She asked. Who was I anyway to deny her ever. And, what else was common, wait, wait and wait. After almost an hour, she called me back, "Can you come to my station, and pick me up, we'll go together". I picked her up, and then she asked "What did you have had in lunch?".

"Nothing", I replied. It was hard to eat anything, I wasn’t willing at all.

 "Are you mad? Why are you doing this? Come eat something first", She commanded (almost).

I: "Relax, I have no complaints from you at all, I was just not feeling like eating. Can we sit for some time? My bag is way too heavy to carry".

She: "Ok, give some things to me, if that reduces the weight off your back".

I took out the gift that I had brought for her. She gave a strange look, I was familiar of that look. Once upon a time, that was symbol of love, symbol of her smiling the very next moment. She did, she smiled, not sure about love though.

I: "I totally respect your decision, I am totally okay with it. I am happy being with you in whatever way possible. Just be happy. I just got this one for you before coming here, and I'll be happy if you accept it. This one is for you." She accepted it. "Now, come and eat something. Okay let's go KFC, I am sure you haven't been there ever", She took me there. I have had my lunch with her. There was no change in her behavior, such was her strength.

She: "Let's go Gurudwara."

I: "But, it will be too late by the time we come back. We have to go for shopping also."

She: "How often do you come here? Just come once with me. You will like it for sure."

Whenever, she just used the phrase "with me", it got me butterflies in my stomach. "Let's go then", I replied smilingly. We went there, listened to prayers together. It was always so pleasant, similar to 3 years back when she pulled me to temple, when she holded my hands and made me feel what I meant for her. "Hey, see out there, it looks beautiful", my thoughts were interrupted by her voice, and yeah, the Gurudwara did look beautiful. And even beautiful was, to know that the person you love most is standing right besides you, but sometimes, the distance is way too much.

It was late evening, as we came out, "let's shop for some time, then we'll go for dinner", I suggested.  She choose t-shirts for me, yeah she did, and few presents for my sister too. It was always joyful, shopping with her. She was so exciting and adventurous, I must say. While walking, a guy with some stall on road side shouted "Brother, take this from our shop, God will bless the pair of you two". Both of us burst into laughter. I almost hugged her, saying "C'mon, let's do this, may be this is the only chance for me to have you." I used to see couples after going through tough phases, and they didn't even talk to each other now, so, considering that, shouldn't I be appreciating the way she is with me now, so cool and so friendly, like she promised that day.

We have had our dinner, and then we had to take a small walk, the tough one, maybe last one for the "Weekend". I told her, how much I appreciate and like the way we two are together. She smiled back, she didn’t say a word, but her smile had much more to say. Those were the good things that her smile conveyed. She boarded down at my metro station, to see me off. I holded her hands for a while, she bid me bye, with smiles and wishes. She went out of my sight in a minute or so. I stood there watching her go, "no, I have to see her, I have to, one more time." I ran down the stairs to her platform. There she was, standing there, tucking her hairs behind her ears, she had boarded the metro, but it was yet to depart. I stood there, watching her smile, like the last time I watched her, doing the same smile, way back in time. That was the last hand waving for the "weekend". That was it, but it was full of good moments, and I always believed in counting better moments over bad ones. Good moments define the way to live life, don’t they?

I will make another weekend happen with you, for many more times in my life, I promise.

The Weekend (Sunday)

Read The Weekend (Saturday) here.

Sunday...

After a much satisfactory day, compared to what I imagined, time was to move on to next day. I woke up early in the morning, such was the anticipation. Even more than yesterday, and why shouldn't it be, I was going to do it again. After this much time, after this long wait, I was going to ask her again. I took out the card that I got prepared for her. I was yet to fill it up with words. But, what words could have described the feelings in best way possible, probably at that moment, answer was "none". I stood up to mirror, trying to rehearse what I was going to say to her, but I fumbled, or maybe I was emotionless, a null face with some jumbling words. "Huh, am I going to scare her or what, Buck up yourself man!!" I told myself. I got up and freshened up, thinking for words to speak to her all this while.

I called my best friend, " Gosh!!! Why the hell is she not receiving the call at the most important time. Okay, call someone else, yeah here it is". After almost a discussion of 10-15 minutes, there I was, again unsure of what to write. 2 years ago, she had told me once that, in conditions, where I am too tense, I should listen to myself because that is the best thing to do, yes I am going to do that now. Anyway, she told me that she likes my writing. Bingo!! Perfect time for that. Finally, I wrote it, I filled up the card with best possible words up to my caliber, ending with a question, "May I?".

"Hello!! Where are you, we have movie at 12:30, its already 11:30, come fast or else we'll be late" I told her on phone. "You come to metro, I'll meet you there, I am just ready, I will come soon", she added and put the phone down. I brought two big chocolates, which she always loved, along with the card which I eventually got ready to be presented for the occasion. Whenever girls take time to ready, you need to admit that its always worth it. Yes, it is, she looked stunning beautiful today, but just a regular thing for her. She arrived at 12:30, we went to movie from there, though we missed the starting, but anyway, nothing mattered more than her company. I kept on looking at her during all those love songs that came along, her smile and sparkle in the eyes, oh man!! They can make me fall in love with her all over, at any point of time. After the movie, she took me to McDonalds, thanks to GPS facility in mobile phones. All this time, she kept on talking and talking and clicking pictures. I always loved that, I always loved the way she talked continuously, taking up the charge and the way she used to set the conversations on fire with her so simple approach of talking.

"Let's go to CyberHub, its very good place, kind of corporate place, but I bet you will love the scenery" She told. What else I'd wish. I wanted to spend quality time with her, at some place in solitude. We went there. It was quite cold there, but worth spending time with someone. She clicked some more pics of mine, and some selfies too. Pics with her, ah!! Why I didn’t do it last time, but as I said "time never comes back, stays only the regret".

"Will you have a cup of coffee, good for this cold" She asked me.

"yeah, sure, and we'll term this special show "Coffee with Mr. Awesome", and I'll be your host for the entertainment today", I said, as I saw a glimpse of smile on her face. I purposefully tipped my cup of coffee over my fingers, "oh, it's too hot, can I hold your hands, they would be cold" I said. She smiled but she took my hands in her hands and cupped my fingers with both her hands. This was the thing that I will remember for years. Her touch, her hands being in my hands, we holding the hands together, what a feeling. I was continuously smiling, "finally, I am able to hold your hands in my hands" I said, she smiled, "so do you feel better now?". Then she showed me her previous work place and other places, they were worth watching. I was quite impressed, but there was something more beautiful. Walking along with her in that cold evening with she being so actively involved, that reminded me of our old times, old dreams.

We came back for dinner at Hotel Sarvana Bhawan, as the attendant announced my name, "A table for 2, sir please have a seat there." As we finished up a sophisticated dinner with lots and lots of food sharing (that’s lovely), I offered her the chocolates which I brought for her. I was a little afraid when we discussed her long term opinions on life, but I was happy at same time that she wanted to live freely.

"I can't wait anymore, I have one more gift for you, this card" I said as we were taking a walk post dinner.

"Oh!! We have discussed this multiple times, I'll read the card later, and seriously you still think this will work?" she responded, as she saw what I wrote for her.

**P.S. I love you**. But there was no anger in her words, just a mild denial.

I: "2 years back, at some point of time, you wanted me to take steps, make efforts to get to you, to make you feel that you are important to me, that's what I am trying to do"

She: "But I have prio.."

I interrupted her, "I know, I totally understand your priorities, and I respect them. I want you to concentrate on your career, I don’t want to be a burden to you. I want to support you"

She: "See, what we have now, is so awesome. We are going so good as friends. And, I don’t need someone's support. I am good with my efforts."

I: " I want to walk along with you. I am not asking you to talk to me every day like for hours, give your time to your career. I want a name for our relationship. I want to take a step ahead."

She: "If I am not giving you time, it won't make much sense to commit with you. I will not be happy myself, doing this to you. You are a good person, and I appreciate because you did this."

I: "I understand, you are also right, but just think, I have no issue, and I'll do anything that I need for this to work"

She: "You came this far for this only, had you asked earlier, you might not have needed to take this much pain for me"

I: "I would have missed the moments. I want to make the relationship exist in person, not on Facebook and WhatsApp, this relationship with you means a lot to me."

She did not say anything, but she smiled, she stood beside me all the while, during the ride back to home, in metro. As she was leaving, I told her  "I'll be happy with whatever you decide, because I want you to be happy. What you did for me all this time, I'll be thankful to you always, whatever be the day." She smiled and waved her hands, as we bid bye. I watched her go. I came back to my hotel. She called me asking whether I reached home. There were glimpses of tears late night. But, I was happy. My best friend, she called me, asking what happened, she advised me to move on, but I have decided to stay for her. I'll stay for her, I'll wait for her. Her happiness and her being with the falls and rise of life, is more important for me. I wiped the drops off my face, but I was happy for her.

I slept, anticipating, if she will even come to meet tomorrow, Will she? What way she will respond? I did not know, but I knew, that I am happy for being with a person, so open and practical with thoughts.