Abomination

Don’t call me by my name,
I don’t like my name.
Those piercing sounds of my name,
I don’t like that.
Though I’ve a name plate
On my door,
But, I don’t like my home.
On the top right corner of book,
I had written my name,
To state the ownership of it
I don’t like my book anymore.
My name was written on letters too,
That I had written to you
Now, I don’t like you either.

Sitting under the roof,
On a fine evening,
When i was turning pages
of yesterday,
I found one of me,
But, it wasn’t me.
Names hadn’t changed,
But probably I had.
With passing time,
I kept on wearing
A new layer of time,
Now, it’s like
I don’t like myself either.

When spring came,
New leaves sprouted,
Mango groves welcomed
Baby mangoes on-board ,
But, no one came to my garden.
That swing which we had set
years ago, in centre of our garden,
That’s empty,
Swinging with the breezes.
I was sitting in the corner,
Trying to forget our names.
That garden is still there,
I don’t like going there,
I don’t like myself either.

In Between

Beyond this side of life and,
Ascending the other side of life,
Between those two ends,
There was another city,
Hidden in plain sight.
The city, which
everyone had gone to,
But, nobody had visited it.
A life, that everyone had lived
But, nobody had lived it.

From this side of life,
With you on my side,
To that side of life,
without you on my side.
In between,
There were countless efforts
To be with you,
For us to be together.
How long were we together?
We were not even together.
From this side of life, having you,
To that side of life, not having you,
Maybe, I have had set aside
Something in my life too.

Beyond the sights of
That glaring sun
Hitting right in the eyes,
And, preceding the sights of
Pitch dark black clouds,
There were few more moments,
Moments of thunders,
Moments of lightning bolts,
The lightning, that
Everyone had seen,
But, nobody had seen it,
In a life that everyone had lived
But, nobody had lived it.

कहीं खो गयी है वो

कहीं खो गयी है वो लौ,
दीये और लालटेन की बत्ती
जलाने वाली वो लौ
कहीं खो गयी शायद
मैं ढूंढता हूँ
उस एक लौ को,
वो लौ कहीं नहीं मिलती
बिना उस लौ के
एक अँधेरा सा लगता है,
वो लौ खो गयी कहीं

लौ नहीं है तो, अब मैं
सितारों भरे उस आसमान
के नीचे लेट जाता हूँ
अँधेरा किसको पसंद है,
उजाला उतना तो नहीं
जितना उस लौ से था
पर, कुछ न होने से
अच्छा कुछ होना है
बिना उस लौ के
एक अँधेरा सा लगता है,
वो लौ खो गयी कहीं

क्या वो लौ अब भी
उतनी ही जगमग होगी ?
क्या कहीं तूफां के झोंकों में
वो लौ अब भी जलती होगी ?
पर, वो लौ तो मैंने शायद
कभी जलाई ही नहीं
वो लौ जो मेरी
कभी थी ही नहीं
शायद जिसका वजूद नहीं
उसका खो जाना ही अच्छा है
वो लौ खो गयी कहीं
पर,
ठीक है,
ठीक है,
ठीक है।